Splitting up with your spouse can be traumatic enough, without the extra stress that long, drawn out court proceedings add to the situation. If there has been an irretrievable breakdown in your relationship and you have come to the conclusion that going your separate ways is the only sensible solution for both parties, read the following tips to see how you can get through this difficult time with the least hassle possible.
- Discuss the matter with your partner. If you are able to resolve your differences and separate without any outside help, this will of course be the cheapest option and possibly the least problematic. However, if you are unable to communicate without your emotions clouding the issues or you are worried that you will get a bad deal without the advice of an independent mediator, you may prefer to explore other avenues. When tricky financial negotiations are involved and custody of young children cannot be agreed upon, discussing it between yourselves may be an impractical choice.
- Hire an experienced solicitor. If mediation is not fruitful and settling the matter between yourselves is not an option, the easiest way to proceed with a divorce is to hire a legal professional to take care of all the details and represent your interests. A good solicitor will have a great deal of experience of negotiating fair settlements and ensuring that their clients’ interests are always a priority throughout the proceedings. They will also be familiar with the grounds for divorce that courts will accept and can advise you which one is likely to be the most appropriate choice in your particular situation.
- Move out into temporary accommodation until a settlement has been agreed. If you find that you are taking every opportunity to argue with each other because of the tensions caused by your divorce, living in separate accommodation is sure to bring relief to both parties. Whether your marriage has broken down because of interference from the in-laws or irreconcilable differences between you and your partner, putting some distance between yourselves could give you a better chance of remaining friends after the proceedings have concluded.
- Do not try to hold onto belongings that mean very little to you, just to be spiteful. If you know that your partner really loves the curtains in your home and you have never been that keen on them, it would be silly to argue who will get them when you separate. Try to remain calm and level headed at all times and don’t let your emotions run away with you. If you are able to be mature about the whole process, your partner may respond in kind and not battle you for the possessions you have accumulated that are dearest to your heart.
- Never argue in front of your children. It can be very hard to follow this rule but as soon as you start to drag your children into the proceedings, things will get an awful lot messier and more unpleasant. If you take the advice above and move into separate accommodation, this should not be a problem but if you are still living together it is important to consider your children’s feelings.
If you are able to separate from your partner, come to an amicable agreement regarding custody of any children involved and divide your assets fairly, without becoming embroiled in acrimonious arguments along the way, you will have done very well. Many couples are unable to achieve this but if you think carefully about the advice in this article and apply what you can to your particular situation, you may be one of the lucky few.