Using surrogate mother to help you bear your child is seemingly a controversial issue in the society. But with the advancement of technology and the desire of parents to have their own child, surrogacy has become one of the technologically advanced options that couples are offered today. Finding a surrogate mother produce a biologically related child is a great challenge. You need to be very careful in choosing the woman who will conceive your child to make sure that your baby comes out healthy and strong. For parents, they look for a surrogate mother whose general health is ideal and who can be a close kin to the couple or a qualified surrogate mother from an appropriate agency. Countries like India have become a most favorable destination for couples looking for a surrogate mother.
There are different reasons why a woman decides to use a surrogate. A woman who might have problems with the uterus or having medical conditions where pregnancy is very risky can resort to surrogacy. Other women who have difficulty in getting pregnant even after medical intervention also choose surrogacy as one way to have a child. The couple has the right to choose the surrogate mother. Some couples ask a friend or a relative to become a surrogate for them. In this way, couples can ensure the personality of the surrogate mother. If a relative or friend is not available, the couple can go to a registered surrogacy agency to look for a qualified candidate as a surrogate mother.
How To Choose Surrogate Mother
1. Choose Some one in Your Family
If surrogacy is something that you as a couple is ready to undertake, then it is time for you to find a surrogate mother. While choosing a friend or relative is better, the challenge comes when this option is not available to you.But, the fact is that in the real world this option is not available to most of the couples who want to have a baby.
2. Search on Internet
Look out on the internet for various surrogate agencies or IVF clinics around your area. If that even doesn’t help, then place ads on surrogacy, adoption, parenting and fertility websites to look out for one. Make use of your social network and inform your close friends if they know of any woman who can become surrogate mother. Approach a couple you know, who have used the services of surrogate mother. Ask them about their experiences and pros and cons of the same.
3. Read About the Laws
Although there are no strict regulations in qualifying surrogate mothers, experts agree on recommending the criteria for an appropriate surrogate mother who is at least 21 years old. She should have a previous pregnancy of at least giving birth to one healthy baby. She should be willing to undergo general health and mental screening done by professional doctors. She should understand and be willing to take the responsibilities of a surrogate mother and signs contract in line with this role. You can read more about the surrogacy laws in your state since each state has different laws.
4. Find Surrogacy Agency or an Independent Surrogate
After you educate yourself regarding the process of surrogacy and determined to undergo it, the next step is to search for the right agency or an independent surrogate. You need to do the search yourself with the existing surrogacy agency to ensure that you are picking the appropriate surrogate mother. You can try visiting different agencies or meet personally with independent surrogates so that you will know more about your options and to eventually make the right decision. Choose an independent surrogate who can show her medical record. If you are dealing with a surrogacy agency, make sure that it performs medical and psychiatric tests for its candidate surrogates. This is to ensure that the surrogate mother is healthy and fitting to conceive a baby.
5. Talk To Potential Surrogates
Take time to meet potential surrogates. Through this meeting you can discuss about important matters regarding the process and both your expectations. You need to be comfortable with the process as well as the surrogate mother needs to cooperate with you and be willing to take her responsibilities. Once you have selected your candidate to become a surrogate mother, be ready to sign a contract to make your agreement more binding. Remember that this is a mutual decision and both parties should agree on the details and inclusions in the contract.
6. Agree on Contract and Payment in Advance
Agree on the payment as well. Choosing a surrogate mother through an agency may cost you higher because it usually handles all the details. When you opt for an independent surrogate, make sure that fees and all other details are clear before you finally sign the contract. Having the contract will protect your rights and that of the surrogate mother. The whole process of finding a surrogate mother can be tasking and you need to be very careful in making your choice and verify the identity of the surrogate mother and the agency.